Monday, August 2, 2010

Bittersweet Symphony

Picking the hubby up from the airport in an hour and a half. Honestly, it's a little bittersweet. I love him, don't get me wrong. But him being here, means that I have to go back to Arizona at the end of the week. It's hard on me, living there. All my family is here. I had friends here. I liked my life here. In Arizona, I have no one, well except hubby of course! It's tough going from working and going to school to being a stay at home mom in a blink of an eye.
I don't want this post to be taken as I'm not happy with him, that's not what I'm saying. We're in Arizona so he can provide for us. And I love that. That he's taking a plunge, that he's working his ass off, for us. For me. It's been a hard road, our relationship. He finally grew up and realized what he needed to do. I'm grateful. But that doesn't mean I can't be upset that we're there. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss my life.
I'm also not saying it's his fault. It's no ones fault. It's life. And as we've all heard, life isn't fair. I love that he loves his job. I love that he is so freaking good at his job. I hate that he travels. I'm jealous that he loves what he does.
I can't wait for the company to sell, so we can move back home. I can't wait for that. I want to go back to school. I want to work. I want my baby to be happy. And I want my big baby :) to be happy.
Some things are gonna change when we get home. Date night at least once a month. One weekend day just for daddy and baby, alone time for mommy. Hopefully double dates with Nessa & hubby. Looking at houses to rent. Better money management. Figure out how I'm going to go to school. Think about the next baby :).
I haven't seen hubby since June, so obviously I'm happy that he's coming. I just hate that I have to go back to the routine Arizona life.

I'll probably get some shit for this post, but oh well.

2 comments:

  1. Aw, still- you'll have a happy reunion!

    I understand where you are coming from. I had to move away from all my family and friends to where my husband had a good job. It's been since last fall and I still feel a little lost sometimes. I wish I could be around MY family and MY friends and have a life outside of just my husband and kids, much as I love them.

    At least yours might have an end in sight- we ar here for the long haul.

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  2. You're gonna work it out sister! And you do know some peeps in AZ!

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